Was it worth it? The answer to that question for me is both yes and no. Yes, because I made available to my children the tools they needed to do well. No, because it doesn’t really change the bottom line much. This is not a scientific study, just my life experience with my 3 children. They each took the SAT several times, their scores did not vary more than 100 points (not always in the higher direction). If I think back to all of those standardized test they took in grade school, the ranges they fell between back then are the same ranges they fall between today. This much I know, at the end of the day their ability is their ability, but we would be remiss as parents if we didn’t provide every opportunity for them to lead a successful life.

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After he left it dawned on me, there would be no more summer assignments to harass him about, no more first day of school pictures, no more supply lists, no more permission slips, I filled out my last set of contact information papers; he would be the last one to take senior portraits and the list seemed to go on. Wow, it was a very surreal and emotional moment for me, I realized I am about to begin a new chapter in my life. As a  parent, I anticipated my first child’s milestones, with my second child I was ready for them, with my youngest he arrived here…in the blink of an eye.

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The anxiety of the first day is very real for most children, while they may be returning to the same school, the dynamic changes yearly. There are many questions that run through their heads…Is my outfit okay? Will my friends I haven’t seen all summer still be my friends? Who will I talk to at my locker? Will I sit with the same kids at lunch? Will someone save me a seat?

There is comfort and security in what they are familiar with, the first day of school brings with it too many unknowns. We as parents may be many years removed from school, however; those memories come flooding back when you sense your child is stressing about the first day. My advice to you, be calm, be patient and try very hard not to overreact, they will make it. I was never a fan of the first day of school, both as a child and a parent, I liked the second day much better.

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My worries were all unfounded, they did an exceptionally creative job. A trip to the local party store yielded a beautifully set table, a simple white table cloth with Tiffany blue flower petals tossed on top, white roses in a vase tied in a blue ribbon, white tapers in crystal candlesticks tied with satin ribbons and dinner mints in packages sealed with a bow. There were party games, tiaras, sashes and the traditional hat made from bows, it was a fun atmosphere. The menu was easy, they are after all in their 20′s, so we decided to keep it light, they ordered from the local Italian deli. The food was delicious, it included a vegetable platter, dips and chips, focaccia sandwiches with grilled chicken, mozzarella and roasted peppers, an angel hair pasta salad and a green salad. Drinks were wine, iced tea and mimosas in pretty colored glasses. In lieu of a sheet cake, they opted for cupcakes with Tiffany blue icing on top and a refreshing fruit salad. I have to say, given their limited funds the day turned out beautifully. The bride-to-be was happy, the guests were happy, I  was relieved, uh I mean the hosts were relieved…it truly was simply beautiful.

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I was shopping this week, looking to pick up the usual…notebooks, loose leaf, folders, pens, pencils and so on. When I realized the school supply section had been downsized and replaced with a very large display of  Halloween candy! When did back to school shopping include picking up Halloween candy?  Come on…really? As Moms we are constantly trying to make sense of the many mixed signals we receive. We are told to take time out and appreciate the moment, enjoy the phase your child is at, breathe….but yet, buy your Halloween candy in August because what if they run out of the good stuff and all that’s left is the crappy candy, heaven forbid you’re the house that gives out the crappy candy! How will your child face the lunch table? Relax, trust me when your child is in their 20′s they will not remember what kind of candy you gave out. So go ahead and buy your candy in October (it will probably be right next to the New Year’s Eve noisemakers)!

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We work very hard for the life we have, Yes, we live in a nice house, in a nice town, but that doesn’t mean we don’t need help paying for college. The cost of sending your child to college is out of control, it is the rare family that can just write that check. A concrete number does not reflect life.

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We were in need of a new BBQ grill, so off I went. After shopping around at many places, I found myself at a rather well known appliance store. I walked by about 5 salesmen and located the grills, I found one I liked and gestured to a salesman. He approached,  he could not have been more than 25…I probably have a bbq utensil older than him. I pointed out the grill I wanted to purchase, he gave a funny look and said, “Are you sure you need a grill that large?” I very politely responded, “Yes, I would also like it assembled.” He then went on to inform me, how difficult that grill would be to assemble. I chuckled and responded, “OK, what does that mean?” He said, “Oh, nothing I just wanted you to know.”  There was one last thing we needed to cover, delivery, this is when my head almost exploded! I told him my husband would be picking it up, that I would not need it delivered. He scrunched his face and said “Ma’am, that is a very large grill, do you know what kind of car your husband drives?” I very sarcastically responded, “Gee, I think so….maybe I should call him…NOT!”  Since the salesman was very young,  I cut him some slack. However; he just didn’t get it. He proceeded to measure the size of the grill and he hoped my husband’s truck was big enough! I finally said, “Buddy, I’m sure it will fit, would you please just ring me up?”

It is the year 2013, for all of the progress we have made as women, it’s still not easy buying appliances!

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FYI, these are not the roads and highways we learn to drive on. Today’s roads are full of too many cars and trucks, and way too many reckless and distracted drivers. It is a mass of rude and self absorbed drivers, who cannot see beyond their own vehicle. Nevertheless, we send our teenagers off into the world of driving.

All three of my children are drivers, trust is a key component. Do I trust they won’t speed, or have too many passengers? Do I trust they won’t use their cell phone or text their friends? Do I trust they won’t drink or do drugs and then get behind the wheel?  I cannot say for certain, there are no guarantees. I can only say I have given them the knowledge and the skill to be safe courteous drivers.  At the end of the day,  all I really have is my faith, hope and that trust they will make the right choices. Crossing my fingers!

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We get so caught up in our day to day life, we rarely take the time to acknowledge the important people in our lives. Never mind actually verbalize our feelings to them. As human being we all need to know we are appreciated, valued and loved. All too often, the people who are most important to us, get what’s left of us at the end of the day. Sometimes the rest of the world gets the best parts of us.

There’s a line in a Rascal Flatts song, it goes, “Love who you love, with all that you have, don’t waste the time if flies so fast.” So, pick up the phone, call someone who means something to you and let them know they are loved and valued by you. Be kind to one another.

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